


Six Things He Never Said

by Sweetest_Thiam



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anchors, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Forgiveness, Good Theo Raeken, Liam Dunbar is Theo Raeken's Anchor, Liam Dunbar-centric, Love Confessions, M/M, Past Liam Dunbar/Hayden Romero, Post-Canon, Sad Liam Dunbar, Theo Raeken is Liam Dunbar's Anchor, Theo Raeken is Part of the Pack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2020-01-23 03:42:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18541558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sweetest_Thiam/pseuds/Sweetest_Thiam
Summary: With all that happened when Liam knew Theo, there was never a good time to say what he needed to, but when plans change, all concept of timing goes out the window.





	Six Things He Never Said

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to my friend Grace, who prompted me: Unwritten Letters. I wasn't sure what that even meant, and I didn't follow the prompt, but it did lead me to create this.

 

Theo Raeken's presence in Beacon Hills wasn't a long stay, but it had certainly been memorable. WIthout him there, there would have been no chimeras and no chimera pack, not to mention Scott, Tracy, Josh, Hayden, and Corey dying (with varying levels of stick) and Liam technically had him to thank for dating Hayden for those few months. Even if it crashed and burned in the end, Liam still felt like this was an unspoken thing that he would always carry around when he looked at the chimera, just like so many others. Six other things went unsaid, six things that were important, six things he should have said before Theo was gone.

But like the lighting bolt that he was on the small, mess of a town they called home, he could disappear somehow quicker than how he came.

Six things went unsaid.

\---

Liam was very vocal, and everyone could agree on that. He'd tell you if he liked something or disliked it, sometimes without any words, a lot of the time with a kick or a punch in the face, something Theo was very well aware of. Usually when he shared his opinions with Theo, though, they weren't anything of the good variety. It was mostly punching, bleeding, breaking his nose, waiting for it to heal, and then repeating the process. There was no telling him that the shirt he was wearing looked good on him or that his voice sounded particularly ~~sexy~~  scratchy that day.

The first time Liam withheld something from him was because it was just seemingly too nice. Theo hadn't had a chance to get a haircut since coming back from hell, and although Liam should have no opinion of what Theo's hairstyle was, he still found that it made the chimera just a bit more...tolerable to look at. Theo was attractive and everybody knew it, but Liam tended not to look at him as objectively as that. Now that his sandy, darker blonde hair fell into his eyes, though, well...things change.

Theo ran his fingers through it occasionally and it would get tucked behind his ear only to fall back into his face again, and even if Liam would never admit it, he thought it was adorable when it bounced back and annoyed him. He obviously put a lot of thought into his hair, but never got it cut unless it was getting really shaggy, to which Liam was always afraid he'd chop it all off again like it was before he went to hell. Theo's hair had been nice then too, but Liam preferred this a lot more.

Of course, there was never a good time to tell Theo this, because in the thick of it all, there was no way to bring up something as little as a few extra inches of hair.

\---

The second nice thing Liam remembered thinking about Theo was so annoying to think about that he dwelled on it for far too long. Liam found himself enjoying Theo's company whenever they were on missions together, and though he acted like he despised the older boy, he couldn't deny that Theo's sarcasm and wit had a certain charm to it. Hayden was never so fast with a response and she never kept him on his toes like Theo did, making him a breath of fresh air to be around. That last part alone was enough to make Liam want to shut his brain up, because Theo shouldn't  _be_  something refreshing. He was the same boy who was sent to hell for a reason. 

Still, his subtle jokes and eyerolls always got Liam through some rough times. Theo was always up for an argument in a somehow entertaining way that pleased his inner anger complex, and it gave him something to funnel his aggression into. Whether it was physical or verbal, they could abuse the shit out of each other, and after awhile, they didn't mean it anymore. Their steady heartbeats would turn to what sounded like jumping rabbits as they lied to get their feelings out, and in the end they would always walk away from each other with a smirk or a smile.

Liam gravitated towards him when he was feeling angry or annoyed and Theo knew what to do, but sometimes the normal spits of annoyance were replaced by silence. Liam stood in his presence and just let himself calm down knowing Theo was there to help him with it if need be, which soon lead to him just spending time around Theo no matter what he was feeling. He could be relaxed and still find himself going to sit by Theo in a classroom or stand near him when the pack was around. He found an anchor in him, and he was a little suspicious that Theo had done the same. Every light push and shove, every offhand comment followed by a playful smirk, every breath made in the same direction sent Liam's simmering blood into rest.

Liam liked being around him, and he liked being around his anchor. But how was he supposed to say that when he wasn't sure if Theo felt the same? How was he supposed to say that when Theo had the past of his?

\---

Theo did have a past, but he also had a present and a future. His second chance at life was showing him, Liam, and the pack that he was getting better, or at least working towards it. He was charitable with his help and had a job, and was actually trying to be a functioning member of society. Even if he was still an asshole, he was nicer in a lot of different ways. He was no longer trying to kill anybody and stopped Liam on several occasions from doing so to be exact, but he was also less prone to tossing people out of the way for no reason like he would have awhile ago.

In the months that followed his return from hell, Liam found that he and Theo weren't just allies and reluctant acquaintances anymore. What he was feeling was closer to friendship, and he started to make that more of a priority as time went on. He made sure that Theo knew he was wanted and looked after, but he never said out loud that they were friends.

They did normal friend things, or at least whatever friend things they could do in their situation. There wasn't a lot of time to hang out or catch a movie, so there wasn't any defining point in their relationship. One day Liam just realized that they weren't exactly enemies anymore and that spanned into what he called a friendship, and a rather exciting one at that. His mouth no longer turned down in a frown whenever the chimera entered a room and instead lit up into a badly-repressed grin. 

Another thing remained unspoken, since just like with the anchor thing, he didn't know if Theo felt the same way. Maybe he wasn't even looking for a friend and he wanted to be left alone. The last thing he wanted to do was make Theo uncomfortable, so he kept his mouth shut and his words once again to himself. Any friendly thing was passed off as normal, and there was no more talk about it.

\---

Theo was a changed man. 

It took Liam a few months to wrap his head around the situation, but he realized that the Theo he knew now was nowhere near like the one he knew a year and a half ago. Last year's Theo was manipulated into being a psychopath, trained to kill. His only orders in life were to gain power and create a better race of supernatural, and at some points, he wasn't even sure if he wanted to. That was what the Dread Doctors ordered, though, and you don't exactly say no to the men behind the masks.

 He was abused beyond his own knowledge, being subjected to tests and surgeries without warning from the time he was ten to when he was barely older than seventeen. Sometimes Liam would accidentally catch a glimpse of what laid beneath Theo's clothes. He knew it was bad when Theo still had scars from whatever the doctors had did to him, since the only thing that could mark a werewolf that badly was heavy poison or tools. Cuts over cuts caused scars that ran deep and long, things Liam wasn't supposed to see.

The worst of it all wasn't even the physical trauma. Now that Theo was back, Liam could see the pain the chimera carried around with him like a bag full of bricks, each one a different subject of his suffering or guilt. The heart that beat in his chest wasn't his and Liam could tell he thought about it a lot. He found that Theo would occasionally start blinking to the beat of his heart, and it made Liam's own tighten in his chest. The chimera had a tic in his jaw that came up when something was nervous, so he could be completely stoic other than a tiny twitch that the rest of the pack didn't notice. He had nightmares so bad that Liam could read it on his face, and the one time they'd fallen asleep near each other, he'd heard his sister's name several times. Theo jumped when he saw knives and reeked of anxiety when medical equipment was nearby. Theo was traumatized.

He didn't regret bringing Theo back, not at all. Without him there, so much would have gone undone and Liam would have died thinking that Theo was nothing but a coldhearted villian. He was glad that he'd been able to see otherwise before it was too late. 

And Liam forgave him. He saw how guilty Theo was and saw how much he regretted it all, and Liam now understood why he did it. This wasn't the same Theo. Now, Liam didn't feel bad about hanging out with him and considering him a friend, but he did feel bad about the things he'd said to him before he came to this conclusion. 

He never got to apologize or admit it. He was afraid Theo would brush him off and say that he didn't need his damn apology, walk away like Liam was the same stupid kid that he had been before when he was throwing insults at him. He didn't know how desperately Theo needed to hear that someone trusted him, how much it would have helped him to know that he was seen in Liam's eyes as good. Silence stayed between them, and Theo assumed after awhile that nothing would come of it, because he was always on some level the bad guy.

\---

"I've got a job." The air was quiet as he said this to the pack, looking around at everyone while they made varying expressions. "I'm leaving Beacon Hills."

His gaze lingered on Liam for just a little too long when he said the four words that made the floodgates almost open. Liam was suddenly silent. Maybe he hadn't said anything about what he was really thinking, but he at least had something to fill the gaps with. Now, there was nothing to be said, nothing at all. No joke, no shove, no smile.

"I'll always come back and visit for the ones who want me to." This time, his eyes flickered to Corey and Mason, but then back to Liam again. "It's a good job. I'm lucky to have it and I can't turn it down."

"Does this mean you're leaving the pack?" Mason asked, and Scott looked at him expectantly. Theo clenched his teeth and Liam looked up from where he was staring at the floor. 

This was what Theo worked for. His place in the pack was earned through blood, sweat, and tears, and it was going to hurt like a bitch if he had to give it up. Liam's heart pounded in his chest as they awaited his answer. He couldn't.

"The job is in Washington," Theo said slowly, his voice strained and sounding painful. "I don't know what that means for me. I have to take it."

"You always have a place here!" Corey protested, and Theo gave a weak smile. Liam stared at the blonde chimera, not letting up even when Theo looked back at him. "You can't go!"

"I-"

"He has to," Liam whispered, saying the first words he'd spoken in awhile, making everyone look at him. Theo's expression softened and he no longer even looked hopeful. "If it's what's best for him, he has to go."

Liam's bottom lip shook and he felt his eyes start to brim with tears. He knew why he was so emotional, and this time, he could admit it. Theo made him feel like no one else ever could or ever did, and he was leaving. Theo might as well have killed him with the way he was feeling.

He knew he looked like a mess already and he wasn't going to be around when it got worse for everyone to see. Liam got up from his chair and looked at Theo for what could have been the last time. He took in everything there was, his slightly taller and leaner frame, the green eyes he'd thought about for so long, the longer brown hair he wanted to run his own fingers through hundreds of times over. He watched him and got what he needed until his vision began to blur. "Good luck, Theo. I know you'll do well." He put one hand on Theo's shoulder before turning away, heading upstairs to Scott's room. Theo watched him go, looking lost, but nothing more was said.

Liam sat on Scott's bed and cried, letting his welled tears fall down his cheeks. He cried for the things he never said and regretted every one of the seconds he wasted without the chimera, realizing with a hit that he would spend millions more just like it. Theo would be in Washington and he'd be in southern California, too far away. He'd be reduced to phone calls and texts until some odd weekend when they had the time, but it wouldn't be enough. The man he loved was leaving, and deep down, Liam knew there was so much more he should have done.

The sound of the closing front door made Liam shudder out one last sob before he got up to look out of the window. Theo had his hands in his pockets, head hung low as he walked down the front path to get to his truck. There were already things packed into it from what Liam could see, meaning he was leaving tonight, but he was much more focused on the chimera himself. He was halfway down the walkway when he looked back at the house, his eyes hurt and hopeful.

Suddenly, Liam's feet were in motion, his mind a racing blur, because if he didn't do this now, he would regret it for the rest of his life. He flung the door open to Scott's room and ran down the stairs, wiping his tear-tracked cheeks on his way down until he got to the door. The pack looked at him and Scott even called out, but he didn't listen.

The cold night air hit his skin with a tang, but nothing could compare to the chill that ran through his body when Theo looked back at him again. The green was shiny with his own tears and Liam started to run again, barrelling towards him without hesitation. This was Theo. There was no time for second thoughts.

Liam's hands were warm on Theo's face, cupping both of his cheeks as he pulled him in for the kiss that made up for the years of unspoken bonds that had been made. Words would pale in comparison to the feeling of Theo's left hand on the small of his back when they kissed for the first time, lips passionate in the dark, teeth and tongue unforgiving. 

The younger broke away with a gasp for air, Theo's scent and cold oxygen filling his fragile-feeling lungs. His cheeks were wet from the saltwater that had spilled from both of their eyes, and Theo rested his forehead against the beta's. "I don't want you to go to Washington," Liam admitted, brushing a thumb across Theo's cheekbone and catching a salty tear that was falling. "I've already been so selfish with you, but I can't have you leave-"

"I don't want to go to Washington," Theo interrupted, and a smile came through the shininess of his crying. "I never wanted to go."

Liam sighed in relief, turning into somewhat of a laugh that would have sounded absolutely insane to anyone else, but Theo returned it before he leaned in to capture the beta's lips in another kiss. With his arms thrown loosely around Theo's neck and Theo's desperate kiss, he felt full, completely and finally. 

\---

Six things had never been said. Thank You,  Attraction, Anchors, Friend, Lost Regret, Forgiveness.

The seventh thing on the list, the most important one of all, had been crossed off. Eight letters that Liam had to say and that Theo had to hear.

_I love you._


End file.
